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Title - Stigmata
My Admission - $3.00
One Line Review - "It's not complete crap."


Stigmata, the new religious thriller from Rupert Wainright, staring Patricia Arquette, Gabriel Byrne, and Jonathan Pryce is not as bad as it could have been but it sure ain't much.  What begins as a typical 'religious thriller' (with an old church in some 3rd world country...I'm talking a lot of fat, crying ladies with no teeth and shit all over em) quickly becomes something rather interesting, for about an hour and then chokes on its own demonic vomit.  NO ONE CAN GET ME AN ACCEPTABLE RESOLUTION! (and someone is paying a lot of cash for crappy endings...I'm in the wrong business.)

Patricia Arquettee plays Frankie Paige a (very modern) Pittsburgh hairdresser who becomes the recipient of the Stigmata:  The 5 wounds Christ suffered during his crucifixion (The one where she gets the whippin' is pretty cool). All very interesting, you say, but WHY? Gabriel Byrne is a scientist/priest who investigates miracles for the Vatican.  He's sent to disprove the story’s of Miss Paige and is drawn into the living nightmare that surrounds her.

Gabriel Byrne is GREAT in this film.  Very watch able and likeable. He smiles allot (it suits him), drinks some beer, and actually has a few things to say that are worth hearing. $2.00 of that $3 is going to this performance. Patricia Arquette is watch able but it coulda justa as easily been Ally McBeal.  Just gunk her in a lot of blood and let her scream, fall down, and swear.  Remember Dream Warriors? Jonathan Pryce - Fuckin Prick.  2nd best character in the film (That ain't saying much) Portia DeRossi - for anyone who does watch Ally McBeal, Portia is the amazingly beautiful, blonde, ice-queen, hoo-chee momma, lawyer who likes to screw the nerd (admirable traits).  Unfortunately she's in about 6 whole minutes and just looks like shit.  Piercings, tattoos, and all. Any other actor - inconsequential

The film itself is directed and filmed in a very 90's fashion. Lotsa fast edits and quick shots of city, sex, & religion, mixed with slow motion actress (in a Porn Star shirt & sheep skin jacket) walking down the street running her fingers through her hair.  The film, in many places, has a very grainy effect.  I'm not sure what style of lens the director of photography used but it bugged me. Other city shots showed everything as grey and colorless.  Except of course our heroine and her apartment.  Damn wardrobe people need to tone it down...just a little.  Although I liked her apartment quite a bit...Nice place to visit I mean.

So there you go...For $3 you'll get your money's worth of blood and bad acting and a little (very little) something to think about.


Movie Information

MPAA Rating:  
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Turn Down The Lights, Turn Up The Sound.

Matthew Gilbert © 1999-2015 All Rights Reserved

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